I am a 32 year old female, married to a transgender woman. I will refer to her as JC in my posts. We have been friends for 20 years, a couple for 15 and married for almost 8. JC told me that she was transgender about 3 years ago. Things are progressing more and more. JC lives life as a women most of the time. She puts on a "boy" costume just to go to work.
It took me most of the past 3 years, therapy, and medication to come to terms with JC's decision and the depression I have been experiencing from this and life in general. I have finally figured out that I can not change her mind about switching and to hold out hope that she would change her own mind just wasn't going to happen. So rather than keep banging my head against a brick wall, I choose to accept her decision and continue to love JC for the person that she has always been and is starting to become.
The problem that I have found is that sexually I have lost some attraction to JC. Things between us sexually have become less man on woman and more woman on woman. Granted I find nothing wrong with woman on woman sex. I still just have a very strong desire for the man on woman type of sex. That pure testosterone driven type of sex that blows your mind. I have also very recently admitted that I have a high interest in BDSM types of activities.
The one thing that had been on my mind for a long was that our sexual relationship could not carry on the way it was. Sex had been on a downward spiral for me for months. I was constantly left frustrated, lacking orgasm, and just craving a rougher, more hardcore type of sex. So after months of thinking about a solution and continually coming back around to the idea that something has to change. I received a boost of confidence from a friend and it hit me that an open relationship may be the solution that was needed.
So after a good sobering conversation with my friend, I approached the subject with JC. Then came the waiting. I knew that I was asking for a lot. Especially considering that her confidence was already shaken by the whole transitioning process. We had a couple more conversations before she gave me an answer. It was finally decided that an open relationship was okay even though it was not completely an option that she cared for. Guidelines were put into place as far as what could and couldn't be happen between other partners. I encouraged and still continue to encourage JC to try exploring other relationships for herself and reconnecting with old friends who were in these types of relationships as well.
So this is were I stand, I am a bi-curious, married female in an open relationship that until recently had not explored any of the new ventures open to me. I have doing a lot of talking with the friend mention before. With his help/doing my own research & explorations, I learned and wish to continue to learn more about the desires I have and the ones that I never knew I had. This is my account of what I have done, what I desire to do and the process of getting there. It is going to be a bumpy ride but I hope you follow along.
